I have been vacillating between beating myself up for not doing more and at the same time beating myself up for not taking it easy. Even for the past two weeks of vacation I haven't stopped thinking about work and other such annoyances. It is to the point I don't feel like I can function right now... I am just letting everyone down, like always :(

I know I need to take better physical care of myself as I have had two weeks of vacation and have been sick most of that time. My immune system is worn and ugh, I just can't handle anymore right now.

I have friends and family and work and attempts at school all pulling me in different directions. I just need some time to figure out what I can do reasonably... the only problem is that the more I do, the more I want to do then I overload. I am sooo scared right now, perhaps I am on the edge of finding out things about myself that I don't really want to know...